Hospital gowns, IVs, and Beds on Wheels

It started on Monday afternoon, a small pain in my lower abdomen.  Nothing significant I thought.  There was so much going on to really stop and take notice at the time.  My parents had arrived for a short visit and we were also in the process of preparing to visit Brad and our new church family in Illinois the day after they left.  My “To Do” list was long and time was running short.  We had a few miscellaneous things to finish for school Monday afternoon, and then we all loaded up in Grandpa’s van for our annual outing to Goebel Tree and Pumpkin Farm.  It was a gorgeous afternoon and we had such a lovely time.  Later that night the pain seemed a little worse but I could handle it.  Had I pulled a muscle?  Well, I’m sure it was nothing and all I needed was a little rest.  So with no other thought, I went to bed.

Fall Fun at the Pumpkin Farm

Tuesday began wonderfully and we enjoyed our time with my parents.  As the school day went on the pain remained.  Was it worse?  Well, I’d keep an eye on it, and when I got home from Illinois I’d call my Dr.  There was still too much to do.  The house needed to be cleaned and I had preparations for our trip.  After all, we had pictorial directory pictures for RCC and I had shopped for some clothes for the kids to wear!   Dad and mom took us out to eat that night so I wouldn’t have to cook and it was such a treat.  We ate a nice dinner, enjoyed good conversation, and returned home.  Soon after arriving home my symptoms worsened, and I texted Brad to let him know I was going to call the Dr. in the morning.  Within a short time, however, I went downhill quickly.  Now I had hot flashes, chills, and nausea, but no fever.  Mom and I managed to get the kids in bed.  Once they were settled I told my parents I needed to go to the ER.  Mom stayed up with the kids and Dad drove me.
 
The staff was wonderful and soon had me checked in and back in a room relaxing in my personal taxi (bed on wheels) with an IV, and a simply gorgeous hospital gown.  I have to say the personal taxi rides to my tests were nice.  A person could get used to being taken from place to place reclining with a nice warm blanket.  The nurse that put the IV in gets the highest praise as I’m an incredibly hard stick and he did it on the first try.  Typically when needles and I get together, I pass out.  His ability to get it in quickly meant I was conscious the entire time.  It was nice to be able to remember the entire visit and know I didn’t mumble anything embarrassing or inappropriate while passing out or coming to.  Hospital gowns have to have multi uses.  I think mine could have doubled as a grill cover but it only had two ties so maybe not.  Even though it was plenty big….it just didn’t close the way it should have to make this self-conscious girl feel comfortable.  I’m sure I had to have flashed several people including my dad and that is just plain wrong. 



On my first trip to the ultrasound lab, I had a few moments alone in a room to actually stop and be still.  I had uninterrupted time to think.  Time to start processing all the things that had happened for the last few days and start to process what was going on with me and my health at the present time.  I began to get teary and I wanted Brad with me but he was in Illinois.  I began to think about the kids and what if what was going on with me was serious.  My mind began going 100 miles an hour.  I didn’t have time for this, you know?  Moms don’t get sick.  We have too much to do, right?  How was I going to drive to Illinois?  What was I going to do in the morning when my parents left?   Yes, I realize now how ridiculous that sounds, but I was still in denial that the plans we had made had changed.

While waiting for all the preliminary tests to come back, my dad joined me in my cozy ER suite and the nurse gave me some REALLY good medication in my IV for nausea and pain.  That warm, tingly, floaty feeling was so weird but it did help me relax.  It was at this time that Dad informed me he and mom would be staying with me until I felt better.  I felt so bad.  They had other plans.  They had reservations in other places later in the week.  They had other things they wanted to do and 40+ years later, they were still being terrific parents and with no second thoughts gave it up to be with me.  I kept thinking about how I had messed up their vacation.

After another test, I discovered I had an irritated digestive tract issue and should be fine over time.  So I was discharged with a couple prescriptions.  I had to give up the hospital gown and bed on wheels.  One was so much easier to give up than the other!  Then I was able to call Brad and talk to him personally and let him know I wasn’t going to be able to make our originally planned trip. We were not going to be able to get our pictures taken.  I was so upset.  Again, somehow I had messed things up.   This was not how it was supposed to be.   I had plans and pictures and I was going to get to hear Brad preach!

In an instant everything changed for me, my parents, my husband, and our children.  All the plans that had been made, all the things on my to do list, all the chores still left to do, it all changed.  I now had to be flexible and there was a new plan.  I do not excel at being flexible and it causes pressure to build up inside of me at times but I’m learning.  Brad ended up coming home to help take care of me and the kids.  It was the best medicine I could have had.   You all can have the Avengers….I have my own set of super heroes here and they are awesome – Brad, my parents, Neil, Madeline, Sarah, and Samuel wore their super hero capes with pride.

It’s been a different kind of a week.  It was nothing like what I had planned.  It was scary at times and full of questions.  It was a week where I experienced the love of my family in a new and different way.  It was a week where God continued to take care of us and our daily needs.  It was a week where I was blessed in ways I would not have imagined.  It was a week of changed plans.  I’m so grateful for good medical staff, my handsome husband guy, wonderful parents,  and terrific kids.  I am so incredibly blessed!!

 

I’m not used to being the one who is being taken care of.  I prefer being the caretaker.  I felt fragile for the first time in a long time and realize even more how precious the time is that God has given us to be upon this earth.  There is still a lot of work to do.  So as I was in the hospital this week, the experience made me reflect on my daily goals and as a list maker, my "To Do" list.  I was reminded that plans change, and sometimes very quickly.  What are the things that really matter?  Do the things on my to do list fulfill His purposes for my life, or my own desires?  Am I living for Him and to please Him or am I just living day to day to please myself and fulfill my own goals?  It is so easy to get caught up in my own agenda and my own plans.  The day to day activities of living life and being a mom and homeschool teacher can crowd out God’s plans for me that day. I am ashamed to say I don’t pray over my list with the right attitude.  Too many times I have made my list and asked Him to bless my day and give me strength to complete my tasks without a second thought to what He might want to do in me or through me that day.  How many opportunities have I missed because of that?

 

Thankfully today is a new day.  I’m not sure what’s ahead, but God does and He promised to go with us and never leave us.  So I continue to rest and heal and look ahead to a new day.  As I make my  to do list for the next week and go over my plans for the week ahead, I’m thinking differently.  I want my life, every part, even small things to honor him.  I want to see His plan for me more than my own plan for my day.  Please keep us in your prayers – prayers for continued healing for me and for the sale of our home. We are so blessed to have you all in our lives. Thank you!

 

 

The Secret Recipe for a Lasting Marriage

September 30, 1962 my parents were married on a Sunday afternoon at 2:30 p.m.  They were married on the half hour so as the minute hand on the clock traveled its path back around it would “catch” all the blessings.  They spent their wedding day doing what I’ve always known them to do on a Sunday.   They spent that morning in worship.  My dad had just started his first full time preaching ministry at Kingman Christian Church in Kingman, Indiana in July of 1962.  He got up and went to worship and preached the Word.  My mom attended Second Church of Christ in Danville, Illinois and so she went to Sunday School and worship there that morning.

It was a simple service and the ladies of the church decorated the reception area so mom didn’t have to worry about any of that.  I found out last weekend that my grandfather Hibbs told my mom if she started crying as he was walking her down the aisle that he would start skipping her down the aisle.  So she didn’t cry because she told me, “He was serious!”  I find that hard to believe because my mom is a very sensitive and emotional being.  Her sensitivity and tenderness are such precious qualities.  In fact, Brad and I sometimes judge a movie by how my mom will react and usually have a few we want to watch with her just to see her reaction!


Mr. and Mrs. Larry McMillan
September 30, 1962

 My mom was originally from Memphis, Tennessee and it was her southern drawl that attracted my dad to her.  My dad’s red Plymouth caught my mom’s eye.  Then they were introduced by a mutual friend but this friend told my mom that Larry wasn’t her type.  Come to find out this friend liked my dad!  Oh we women are something sometimes aren’t we?!  Mom decided she’d like to find that out for herself!  They dated a long time and were engaged two years before a couple of the ladies at church gave them money for a marriage license.  I think my parents were just content knowing they had each other and the ladies of the church were the impatient ones! 

 

 

Over the course of the past 50 years they ministered 10 of those years in Kingman and had three children, Tim, Paul and me.  When I was a year old they moved to Oxford Indiana and started a new ministry at the Oxford Church of Christ where my dad is still ministering at that local congregation of believers.  In my lifetime I have watched them go through good and challenging times together.  I’ve seen good, bad, and ugly.  However, they have stuck together even when things weren’t so rosy.

While I’ve never asked them what the secret is to a lasting marriage, I already know the answer because their actions have always spoken louder than their words.  It’s because of the relationship they each have with the Lord.  I have fond memories of waking early in the mornings and finding my mom in her chair reading her Bible or starting her day in prayer.  I have fond memories of going downstairs to my dad’s office of a morning and finding my dad reclining in his chair with his feet crossed and kicked up on one of the desks in his office with his Bible or devotional on his lap and his eyes closed in prayer.  This relationship has provided a foundation for not only their individual lives but their marriage as well.  It is the rock they cling to in the bad times and rejoice on in the good. 

Larry and Roberta, still precious 50 years later!

This foundation in Christ has taught them that love is not a feeling or emotion but a choice to love for better in the good times and for worse in the bad, during times when money was plentiful and when it wasn’t, the healthy periods of life and now during sickness when my mom and dad deal with diabetes and as my dad deals with asthma.  They try to model a love that will honor, respect, cherish and treasure the other above their own needs or desires.  A love that is patient, kind, unselfish, humble, seeking the good in the other, refusing to speak badly about the other and one that doesn’t keep score or gets angry when things don’t go their own way kind of love. 

Don’t get me wrong.  They struggle at times and fuss at one another and have moments of intense fellowship, but in the end it all comes back to what their marriage is built upon.  Their marriage is built upon the Rock, and during those storms He is faithful and immovable.  When the storms have passed, their marriage has remained intact and their relationship to God and each other has not only endured but become stronger.


Saying their vows to one another again

This past Sunday, September 30, 2012, we had a wonderful celebration for Dad and Mom in honor of their 50th Wedding Anniversary.  My sister-in-law, Sheryl did most of the planning and all I can say is…it was beautiful!  50 years later though,  they were still about the Lords work.  Mom taught in her Sunday School class and Dad was preaching the Word!  After service, we surprised them with a vow renewal ceremony and my dad serenaded my mom with Irving Berlin’s song, Always.  My mom wanted my dad to sing to her at their wedding but he thought he’d be too nervous so he didn’t.  It was so romantic and precious to hear him sing to her Sunday.  Many wet eyes in the sanctuary!  He thought he was going to surprise her at the reception but when he found out about the ceremony he sang it to her there.  There was a luncheon with the church family and then from 1-4 p.m. a reception held that was open to the community.  It was a great day!


I’m so grateful for my parents and their example to me, our family, their grandchildren, and those in the community where they serve the Lord.  I’m so blessed to have them in my life and grateful that God has blessed them to reach this wonderful milestone in their lives this side of eternity.  My prayer for them is that they get to enjoy many, many more Golden Years together as they walk hand in hand with each other and with the Lord!  Congratulations Dad and Mom!  I love you!

They make such a cute couple!

 

A New Name

For the past year, Neil has been asking me about coming up with a new school name for our home school.  At first I didn’t know what to think...what was wrong with Ferris Home School?  I kind of thought he was being his silly self and it would pass. I was wrong.  It didn’t.  He kept asking.  We’ve always taught our children that their identity isn’t found in earthly things or affiliations, but in who they are in Christ.  That’s what makes them significant.   After some thought and discussion, I realized he just wants to have some common ground or an identity on a common level to connect with his peers.  I revisited the reasons we home school and his motives for this requests and realized that by providing these simple things I was not compromising anything we were trying to teach or accomplish here at home.  In fact, it could be an opportunity to enhance those things.  So Brad and I began the process of working on a new name. 

Here is where I have to stop and make a confession to you all.  When we made the decision to homeschool April 2007, we did a lot of investigating and praying and interviewing people over the course of several months.  When it came time to withdraw Neil and Madeline from public school I had downloaded a form from HSLDA and on that form there was a place for the name of our home school.   A name?    Hmmmm.  Well, from some of the research we had done initially, I knew people just took their last name and added home school to it and that was it.  So, I wrote on the line Ferris Home School and with no other thought our school had a name and that was that.  I was really ready to just move onto the more fun part of curriculums and co-ops and lesson planning.

Now six years later, I realize while that was the easy thing to do at the time, it wasn’t necessarily the best thing.  Did their education suffer from that?  No.  They have continued to learn and grow and it’s all been so good.  However, our school name will appear on our children’s transcripts and I want more than anything to create a family bond and a school identity that they can be proud to be a part of.  Brad an I put our heads together and began to brainstorm ideas.  It was actually a very fun process for us and today I’m pleased to reveal to you our new school name.

Children are a heritage from the Lord, offspring a reward from him.  Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are children born in one’s youth.  Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them.
They will not be put to shame when they contend with their opponents in court.

 Psalm 127:3-5

 

The Ferris Home School has become Heritage Day School, home of the Warriors.  Our logo was created by a new friend who is a graphic artist in Illinois using the arrow from the verse.  Now we can print transcipts with our new logo and also print t-shirts and sweatshirts for the children.  Our school colors are red, white, and blue:  red for the blood of Jesus, white for purity, righteousness, and victory, and blue that is associated with God and His Word and service to Him.  I’m excited to have a name that reflects what we hope to accomplish here at home - to raise up godly men and women in service to their King leaving a legacy for generations to come.  Upon graduation we will pull each from the quiver and our prayer is each one will fly straight and true as they follow God’s plan for their lives.   

I am so very, very blessed to have Neil, Madeline, Sarah, and Samuel.  I am doubly blessed to have the opportunity to be their teacher as well.  I cherish them and the time I get to spend with them teaching them about the Lord as well as reading, writing, and arithmetic.  It’s an exciting time in our lives and the life of our school.  God is working and moving and we are so grateful.

Go Warriors!